Things I Love: Country Music Edition

I 100% genuinely love country music and everything about it. But over the years I have made some peculiar observations. Yes, country music is hokey and corny, but that is part of what makes it great. So here are a couple things I love about country. God bless 'Merica!

1) Unapologetic Patriotism. WQYK plays the National Anthem every day at 12 noon, on-the-dot. And always a different country version of it. It seems as if every country singer has recorded a version of the anthem and each one is glorious. Additionally, US 103.5's tagline is "America's Music. Country Music." So basically, if you don't love country music, you don't love America. End of discussion.

2)Pandering to the Local Market. After 50% of all country songs become a top hit, they change certain phrases to pander to specific regional sports teams. For instance, in Eric Church's "Love Your Love the Most", 'I love college football games' becomes 'I love Bucs (or Bulldogs, etc.) football games'. If they were to record a new line for every major market in the U.S., that'd be at least 50 versions. Now that's commitment to pandering. If only politicians put in as much effort...

3) Christmas Albums. No other genre of music puts out as many X-Mas albums per year as country does. Every country musician and their mother has a country album, and most of them butcher timeless classics. But since I personally do not like Christmas music, country versions are generally an improvement upon them. Best country X-Mas song: "Leroy the Redneck Reindeer" by Joe Diffie. Have a listen, try to disagree with me. God bless that man's mullet.

Worst Movie Plot of All Time

Nick Bollea, son of Hulk Hogan and a Clearwater native, has joined the list of unskilled, no-talent rich kids trying to make it in Hollywood. Bollea, who spent 6 months in jail for a street racing crash in which his best friend suffered brain damage, is unable to be present at a deposition for the civil case against him filed by his friend's parents because of his "skyrocketing" movie career.

A plot summary on the Internet Movie Database said the horror movie, called Kill Katie Malone, is about three college students who "pool their cash to buy a 'ghost' in an online auction." When the students inspect their purchase, they "unleash the vengeful spirit of an Irish servant girl who has been wreaking havoc on her owners throughout the generations."

That has got to be the worst movie plot of all time. Enough said.